Pre-Adoption Training

This weekend Ben and I completed a two-day pre-adoption training.  We went into the training excited, but not really sure what it would entail.  We were excited to be moving forward (and even to spend two full days together), but it was also our first formal adoption training and even our first time seeing our agency and the staff in person.

The training was jam-packed with tons of important information and got pretty heavy at times, but was good to be able to process through the information with others also going through their own adoption adventures.  One of my favorite things was being able to meet and connect with people also adopting and hear their stories of why they are adopting and what kind of adoption adventure they were on.

I can honestly say I am mentally exhausted and yet equally regenerated.  There were some points in the training that brought real tears and stories and issues that are incredibly difficult to imagine or comprehend a child going through - even topics I was already familiar with.  But, in the same moment it made my heart for adoption that much stronger and my yearning to bring my kiddos home even more urgent.

Perhaps one of the topics that really hit home was the idea of promoting attachment as your first priority and just with your nuclear family initially.  They walked us through an exercise comparing a "normal" 24 month old to and 24 month old from an orphanage and their different ages for various aspects of the child.  For example, while both children are chronologically the same age, emotionally the child raised in an orphanage may be closer to 0-3 months.  That child never had a primary care giver devoted to them.  Never learned that when they cry, their needs are met.  Never had a mom to rock them.  Even as I write this, I can't help but tear up a little.  And, while I knew these facts, seeing the comparative ages really solidified it for me.

It was reaffirming for me when Ben and I were able to talk through things and have very similar reactions and thoughts on different elements in the training.  I am so blessed to be on this adventure with my husband and am grateful for the support system we have with our extended families, church family and friends.  It is comforting to know I am surrounded by people who have gone through adoptions and will be supported in the process.

While it is heartbreaking to hear the many issues some kids have when they come into an adoptive family, I cannot wait to be able to start the bonding and healing process and grow our family (not just in number).