Getting settled in Santiago

My, a lot has happened since my last blog post.  Unfortunately I haven't been the best at updating our blog in the business of preparing to move our family to the DR for around 6 months and prepare our daughters' hearts for becoming a family of 6.

Since my last post, we have gone through the preparations for traveling, skyped with our new daughters and safely arrived in Santiago, DR.  It has been a whirlwind of a not-quite-two-months since my last post.  When I go back and read that post it feels forever ago and, yet, I also cannot believe how far we have come!

We arrived in Santiago late on December 11th.  We spent 15 hours from the time we left our house to arriving at the house we are staying at here in Santiago.  I am grateful we have had this week to acclimate to the DR before we get to meet our daughters next week.  Here is a re-cap of our first 3 days/4 nights in Santiago:

Sunday: We got to the Santiago airport around 9:30pm.  We had three flights to get to Santiago - the last leg from Miami to Santiago was pretty emotional for me.  I was filled with awe that we had made it so far, worry over getting through customs with all of our luggage (see picture).  I decided mid-flight rather than let my worries get the best of me to begin praying and praising God for getting us this far and to guide our paths in the steps ahead.  Shannon was sitting by my side and I was able to get some "just us" snuggles in too.  After getting through customs - with very helpful airport employees to help with the massive amount of luggage we had in tow - we went outside and were greeted by the manager of the house we are staying at.  He had arranged us a taxi and escorted us right to the house.  Let me just say, if you are ever in Santiago, I would definitely recommend this place!  He gave us a quick tour and then left us be to recover from our long day of traveling.  We snapped a few pictures and then went to bed.




Monday: Our first full day in Santiago was a bit of an adventure.  You see, our flight into Miami arrived with only an hour until our flight to Santiago.  While we had planned to eat dinner between flights, by the time we got to the gate, our next flight was already boarding - so we skipped dinner.  Needless to say, we woke up a bit hungry Monday morning, but quickly discovered we needed to exchange our US Dollars to Dominican pesos if we were going to be purchasing anything.  We originally thought this would be no big deal, we'd just Uber our way into town to exchange some money and buy groceries.  Boy were we wrong.  Uber saw that we were using US credit cards in the DR and put us on "pending", unable to get a ride anywhere.  We then tried contacting our house manager to help arrange us a ride - only to find out later his phone was at the repair shop and he wasn't getting our texts.  1:30pm rolled around and we had not eaten anything more than some trail mix and the delicious bananas grown on site and we were beginning to worry about what to do long term. After letting us know our last document needed to meet our daughters was issued, our social workers through our agency were trying to problem-solve with us too, but things weren't working.  At least we were stranded in beautiful weather and surroundings!  Just when I was starting to say "OK, God - you got us here, please help us feed our kiddos" the house manager showed up 'unexpectedly' to see how we were doing.  And like that, we were on our way in a taxi to get groceries.  By Monday evening - after eating a real meal - spirits were much higher and despite the initial challenges, we decided Monday was a success after all.  It may have been a bit of a learning curve for us to get where we needed to go, but we did it together!  The day ended smiling about the baby gecko we found in the bathroom and loving the produce we were able to purchase.

Tuesday:  We spent most of the day Tuesday resting, unpacking and exploring "El Jardín Secreto" (The Secret Garden) where we are staying.  We discovered the difference in temperatures of solar heated showers in the morning vs. the evening and let the girls guide our discoveries in the garden.  After such a busy last couple of months, it was a welcome break to soak in all of the beauty surrounding us.













Wednesday: Today we ventured into the center of Santiago to see some historic sites.  We saw la Fortaleza San Luis and el Monumento de los Héroes de la Restauración.  Santiago is a beautiful city, surrounded by mountains.  Perhaps the biggest highlight of our day was getting official word that we will in fact meet our new daughters on Monday!!  God is so good in giving us this week of rest and discovery and preparing us for meeting our girls.

Tomorrow we will get to travel to Jarabacoa to meet with a missionary family who works with our agency and actually has connections with a family from my school back home.  God never ceases to amaze me in the small details like this connection with the missionary family.  We will get to hike the mountains to a waterfall, eat lunch with them and see the school they work with.  While I cannot hardly wait for Monday to come to finally meet my daughters, I am also trying to enjoy the small moments and discover bits and pieces of the country.  I am in awe of how big we are blessed - from friends and family back home praying for us and taking care of our house and pets, to our sister church friends here in the DR checking in on us and making sure we are doing well - God has definitely orchestrated even the smallest of details in this adoption adventure.  I am honored to be a part of it and look forward to what the future holds following HIS plan for my family.

New kind of waiting

We were officially matched with two sisters on September 21st.  Today it is exactly one month from that day.  A lot of work has been done towards preparing to meet our girls and there is so much still waiting to be done.

Between the start of the school year, selling one of our rental properties (closing is today!), and completing immigration paperwork and other travel preparations, this momma has been stretched to her limits.  I have experienced support in unfathomable ways from family, friends, and even families of my students.  I have also felt Satan's pull to create doubt and anxiety in ways like never before.

This new kind of waiting is unlike any of the other nearly 5 years of waiting we have done.  Now the waiting is specific.  I have names and faces to who my heart has been waiting for.  My heart melts every time I look at their pictures and breaks every time I read their file.  My two bio daughters have been beyond amazing with the prospect of adding two more sisters to their family.

I love how thoughtful Shannon is in preparing to be the biggest sister of four - she's even made posters, school presentations about international adoption and might even have a password on her iPad related to her new sisters.
Amelia's heart is so sweet as she prays every night at dinner for God to protect and love D and S while we wait to meet them.

God's hand is undoubtedly in this.  His fingerprints have been all over this adoption journey in ways I could never have predicted.  I still am in awe of the timing of our response to being called to adopt from the the DR being barely a month before our new Reilly girls' entrance into orphanage care.  I believe God was tugging at our hearts when they may have been experiencing some of their most darkest days and God connected us as family years before we would ever know who they are.

I know all of that to be true and feel humbled to be on this adoption journey.  I have to cling to this as I purposefully reject the thoughts and questions Satan is trying to make a reality.  I have heard Satan say to me "There's no way your family can afford to live in another country to 6 months - you are heading for financial ruin."  Or "Do you really believe you are qualified to care for a blind child?  Can you really provide for their needs and will you really be the best fit for them?" Or "Is all of this worth turning your current daughters' lives upside down and taking them away from family and friends?  Aren't you afraid of ruining their lives?" The list could go on...

I can only respond with: "Of course our family cannot do this on our own, but with God on our side nothing is impossible.  His plans for my family are far greater than anything I could dream up on my own."

Our church has been going through a series on Spiritual Warfare this fall.  It is so timely with today's current events, but also with the events going on in my own family.  My best defense against Spiritual Warfare is to go to His word.  Here are just a few verses than have given me strength to reject doubt and anxiety in this season in my life:

Evildoers do not understand what is right,
    but those who seek the Lord understand it fully.
~Proverbs 28:5

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
~Jeremiah 29:11

but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.
~Isaiah 40:31

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.
~Proverbs 3: 5-6

 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.
~Joshua 24:15

I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.
~John 14:18

I will not leave you as orphans

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." ~John 14:18
"No los voy a dejar huérfanos, volveré a ustedes." ~Juan 14:18

This is the verse that has been our adoption verse since we began our adoption journey back in 2012.  It is the verse we have gone back to time and time again.  We've rejoiced in it with the miraculous ways God has shown his mercy and grace along the journey.  We've clung to it by a thread during the steps on our journey where all we had left was to turn it back to God.

 "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." ~John 14:18
"No los voy a dejar huérfanos, volveré a ustedes." ~Juan 14:18

In English and Spanish, I have prayed over this verse for my Dominican children.  It is with much excitement and joy that we can say we officially have been matched with the children we have prayed for for the last 4.5 years.  Sometime near Christmas (before or shortly after), we will be traveling to the Dominican Republic to meet our two daughters!!!  God's perfect timing and grace takes my breath away.

Since New Years Eve leading into 2012, Ben and I have felt called to adopt a sibling group from the Dominican Republic.  Last August (2015) we learned about our two girls and asked to see their file.  Unfortunately, things almost looked like the adoption was not going to ever be a reality for a while as the DR government entity took a long time to approve our dossier.  In December of 2015, our dossier was finally approved and we breathed a sigh of relief.  However, in early 2016, due to changes with the adoption director in the DR, our adoption journey was once again put on hold.  

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." ~John 14:18
"No los voy a dejar huérfanos, volveré a ustedes." ~Juan 14:18

Time and time again, this verse and God's plan for our family sustained us.  This past May, we received a file about the two sisters we asked about nearly a year earlier.  Our agency said we were "soft matched".  Basically, we were getting a preview of the file before an official match.  The file included a picture.  I was in love.

We spent this past summer translating the documents, sending the girls to a pediatrician in the DR for better information and this past Wednesday (Sep 21, 2016) - we were matched and officially wrote our letter of acceptance!!!!

My heart has been mom to "more than two" for a long time, but now I can say I am mom to 4 beautiful daughters and know that the days are limited before I finally get to hug the two daughters I've been praying and preparing for all this time.  It almost doesn't feel real.

On one hand, it feels like the end of a long wait.  On the other hand, I know this is only the beginning.  I am overjoyed, thrilled, thankful and even a little scared.  Most of all and I am anxious to finally hug my daughters and start the bonding process with them.

We announced the news publicly on Wednesday and since then both Ben and I have had many people reach out to us asking how they can help.  After some thought to let it all sink in, here is the list we have at the moment:

1. Above all else: PRAYER
• Pray for our daughters - all FOUR of them! Pray for the new daughters that God will watch over them as we prepare to travel to the DR to meet them.  Pray for Shannon and Amelia that God prepares their hearts to meet their new sisters and move to their new rooms in our house since the newest Reillys will need to be closer to our bedroom (at least in the short term).
• Pray for paperwork.  Our next steps will be applying with US Immigration specifically for the girls.  There will be much more paperwork to come as well.
• Pray for God's perfect timing in scheduling appointments, funding, travel dates, meeting with our Human Resource departments at each of our employers, and so much more that I am forgetting to list right now.
• Pray that God's hand be present in unfathomable ways as we grow our family by two more.  Life will never be the same!
• Pray for Ben and me as we navigate the demands of daily life combined with packing up our family to meet the rest of our family.
2. Be a listening ear
• While we could not be happier, there is still a lot of work to be done before we travel.  Sometimes a supportive listening ear can mean so much.
3. Clothes and shoes - adding two more girls close to the age of Shannon and Amelia means they can likely share clothes, but I know we'll need more with double the love!  We'd also like to pack the two extra suitcases we take to the DR with us for the newest Reillys with items to give to their orphanage.  We would like to bless where our girls have spent the last 4.5 years.
4. If you feel so led, you can give financially.  Moving our family to the DR for 6 months won't be easy financially, so we would humbly accept a financial gift if you feel led to do so.  We have a fundraiser page here: https://www.adopttogether.org/reillyadventure or you can give to us directly.
5. Rejoice with us!

Praise the Lord for His plan to grow our family through adoption.  

Thank you for your support,

The Reilly Family

Ben, Jessica, Shannon, S & D and Amelia

Mended

It's been a little while since my last post back in April.  I am happy to say things are progressing for our adoption and the director delay with CONANI in the Dominican Republic seems to have come and gone.  It is always very humbling to read through my older posts and be reminded where my heart was at that point in time.  Creating this blog was an intentional attempt at recording the many emotions and steps along our adoption adventure.  In some ways it was meant to parallel the journals I wrote to my two daughters while I was pregnant with them and it also has served as a way to update family and friends who have been praying for and supporting us along the way.

The other day I was driving and listening to the radio when Mended by Matthew West came on:

My heart immediately began to reflect on our future children.  Earlier that day I was talking with our oldest daughter about how beautiful adoption is, but that it also involves loss for the child.  I was trying to help both her and her sister to understand why it will be difficult for their future siblings when we welcome them into our family.  I've written about how overwhelming it can be when I think about what my children who I have yet to love on have gone through in the past, but this song tugged at my heart for the hope I have for them.

How many times can one heart break?
It was never supposed to be this way
Look in the mirror, but you find someone you never thought you'd be

Oh, but I can still recognize
The one I love in your tear stained eyes
I know you might not see him now, so lift your eyes to me

My heart continues to break time and time again in this adoption journey and I know it will break countless more times, but each and every time I can lift my eyes to Him and he sustains me.

When you see broken beyond repair
I see healing beyond belief
When you see too far gone
I see one step away from home

When you see nothing but damaged goods
I see something good in the making
I'm not finished yet
When you see wounded, I see mended

We've experience unfathomable support along the way, but we've also heard nay-sayers who have used the very words in these lyrics: "broken beyond repair", "nothing but damaged goods".  I believe with every fiber in my being that God has great plans for my family and my children - ALL of my children.  I too see healing beyond belief and something good in the making.  I hope for the day I can be a part of mending broken hearts.  The song later continues...

I see my child, my beloved
The new creation you're becoming
You see the scars from when you fell
But I see the stories they will tell

You see worthless, I see priceless
You see pain, but I see a purpose
You see unworthy, undeserving
But I see you through the eyes of mercy

This song speaks to my heart, not only about my future children, but also when I think of myself, my husband and my current children.  I am so grateful God is not finished with us yet.

I'm not finished yet
When you see wounded, I see mended

Yesterday, in a teacher's professional development, we were asked what super power we wish we could have.  After thinking about my answer for a little bit, I came to wishing for the power to heal broken hearts.  One of the things teaching has taught me is how a little bit of kindness can go a long way in a broken heart.  I hope God is able to use me to mend the hearts of my precious children.  I am so blessed He is the greatest Healer.

Cast your cares on the Lord
    and he will sustain you;
he will never let
    the righteous be shaken.

~Psalm 55:22

He heals the brokenhearted
    and binds up their wounds.

Psalm 147:3

When time stands still

It is so easy to look at my two girls and wonder where time has gone.  No longer are they my tiny babies creating milestones every day, but they still often leave me speechless in awe of all they are learning.  It is truly a joy to see the world in the eyes of a child and I am beyond blessed to be their mommy.

One of the ways I like to remember years past is by using the Timehop app on my phone.  Most days it is fun to see what we were doing as a family 1, 2, 3 ... 7 years ago.  It is fun to see how much my babies have grown into amazing young ladies.

However, the Timehop app can also offer painfully brutal reminders of how time has seemingly stood still in regards to our adoption process.  While time seems to be flying watching my two lovely ladies grow up, it also seems frozen waiting for the day I get to be mommy to two or three more children I have yet to meet.

Today my Timehop reminded me Easter was on April 5th last year.  With that, it showed me a text exchange I had with my dad where he talked about waving at my other kiddos as they passed the DR on their cruise and he hoped they would be home by next Easter.  That was Easter 2015.

Easter 2016 has come and gone and my arms ache to hug my children I so desperately long for.  Each New Year's Eve, Ben and I pray with hopeful hearts the incoming year will be THE year we meet our future children.  We cling to John 14:18 "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you."

And yet, time stands still.  March 17th, we got a phone call from our agency.  When the phone call came through, I was teaching so it went to voicemail.  I remember heading to lunch and quickly checking my phone and discovering we had a voicemail from our social worker.  I began to listen to the voicemail while making a few quick copies in the copy room - hopeful for progress in the adoption.

Shortly after our dossier approval, we found out the director of the Central Authority for adoptions (CONANI) in the DR has resigned.  While we knew this would been a bit of delay in our journey, we were hopeful because the interim director just so happened to have a good connection with our agency.  We were hopeful this would be just a minor hiccup along the way.

The March 17th voicemail knocked the wind out of our sails.  Since Christmas we hadn't really been given any updates, but we just assumed it was due to the director changes and coming off of the Christmas season.  What we learned in that voicemail was that the interim director had gotten married and left the area - leaving our agency without a contact with CONANI and essentially putting our adoption process on hold.

It has officially been over four years since we began this adoption journey.  More than four years since I began this blog and anticipated the journey to be a "two to four year process".  My now big kids were 1 and 4 when we started on this journey.  I don't think my now five year old remembers a time in her life we weren't in the adoption process.

So much has changed in that time and yet, time also seems to have stood still.  The only thing I can do is to cling to God and His timing to get me through.  As a dear friend who is all too familiar with my current place in our adoption journey said to me as I shared in my desperation, "some days all you want to do is hide under a blanket."  My children - ALL of my children - need me to keep hoping.  For now, I have to fight to hope and trust in God's plans for my family.

When times stands still, I hope in Him.

24 For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? 25 But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

~Romans 8:24-28